I was an Olympic marathon runner of running away from my problems! I convinced myself for 14 years that I was in control of my habits including drugs and alcohol, when I really wasn't. Shame was a driving force that allowed me to hide from telling anyone how much I needed the release of binge drinking or party drugs. Even though I have been a year sober, I still struggle with desire for drugs and alcohol regularly. I also struggle to find people who understand my addiction and offer a perspective that supports sobriety unconditionally.